If I wrote my To Do List at the end of the day, it would look something like this:
Mommy's Monday To Do List:
1.
Spill sippy cup of milk while putting on
lid. Repeat. Cry over spilt milk.
2.
Try to listen patiently while 4 year old
provides multi-faceted rationale for why she should be allowed to eat
marshmallows for breakfast. Start saving
for law school.
3.
Fold 23 size 4T shirts even though I just did
laundry two days ago.
4.
Bribe 2 year old with 10 donut holes to complete
grocery trip. Hope she dropped some
along the way when discover container is empty.
5.
Forget to audit backpack before Pre-K. After school find handful of goldfish, 14 rocks, 3
chapsticks, and body spray.
6.
Find the hiding spot of Friday's sippy cup of
milk by smell alone.
7.
Stare at disaster in kitchen before retreating to organize 2 year old's shirts by color. High Priority.
8.
Get sucked down a Twitter hole for 20
minutes. Complain later there is not enough
time in the day to write a book.
9.
Serve husband "Polish Special" (a
family recipe of beans and ground beef) after forgetting to plan dinner. Remind him sharing heritage with children is
important.
10.
Realize children's feet are filthy as they climb
into bed. Block out this information and
give them a kiss good night.
Yes, another successful day in the life of the Dirty Girls'
Mom.
16 Comments
I block out all kinds of info like that in #10. I feel better, now, knowing I'm not the only one. :)
ReplyDeleteForgot to wipe 2yo hands after playing with some sort of inchworm. Gave her a fruit roll up. She licked her fingers. Gross!
DeleteToo funny.
ReplyDeleteI can barely remember those days. I'm sure I blocked them out too. One thing I do remember is the importance of checking backpacks at the end of the day. We found library books, old food, notes from the teacher. I can't remember all the things we found, I just remember that it was a good thing we had looked!
Oh, my most-essential parenting tip? Have a dog. They eat whatever the kids drop on the floor. Saves time vacuuming!
I could use a dog for that reason. Or maybe just a vacuuming gnome or something. Where would I find one of those?
DeleteI love your humor, Lauri! #5 reminded me of a rotting banana I found in my sons' backpack at the end of the school year. I have no clue how long that's been in there. #9 made me LOL. Your list was my life about 5 years ago. Can't say it'll get better...just different so you'll have a new list to look forward to. :o)
ReplyDeleteI still don't know if "Polish Special" comes from Polish heritage or dirt poor heritage. But yet there is nothing quite as good as a scoop with some fried potato slices.
DeleteCame here via Susie's blog party. I love your list. I'm wondering why we fold kid's laundry. It seems like a useless task, kind of like asking kids to chew with their mouths closed...
ReplyDeleteLeanne (aka Ironic Mom)
Leanne- Your blog is hilarious! I would totally jump off a bridge if you did it first. Especially if you had your 80s hair on.
DeleteSo funny! I don't know how anyone has a blog or uses the social network with little ones. I always crashed out when they took a nap, IF they ever took a nap! Mine are 20 and 22. Last year they lived at home during the summer and I still found it hard to keep up at their ages!
ReplyDeleteI'm just counting the days until I ship them off to kindergarten- don't start telling me about them coming home from college!
DeleteOh how I remember this one: Find the hiding spot of Friday's sippy cup of milk by smell alone. In fact I remember calling poison control once b/c my then toddler found one of those old sippy cups filled with moldy apple juice before I did--and took a sip. Ew!!! :)
ReplyDeleteCalls to poison control are a blog post on their own. My "m" broke off my laptop this week, and I think my 2yo tried to eat it. I was frantically putting tiny pieces of m button back together like a puzzle to see how much was ingested. That was her strangest yet. Confusion with m&ms maybe?
DeleteLOL. And I thought my kindergartner was bad! Can't imagine having more than one. I'm struggling to get through the summer already. Constant need for entertainment and loves to talk:)
ReplyDeleteOne. More. Day. of School. and then "ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
DeleteHa! I've bribed with donut holes too. :)
ReplyDeleteIt does not help that the donut shop always gives me two extra munchkins, saying "aww, how cute!" Maybe those are supposed to be for the kids, but I always eat them. I am cute too.
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