I am sick of having my life invaded at every turn by AI. 

But yet... when I sat down to write my entry for the Kidlit Chuckle Challenge, the prompt "Tami the Talking Toilet" was staring up at me with her big button eyes. She didn't have to be AI, she could just be a delightfully bumbling robot like a C3PO or WALL-E. And maybe even with all her technology and coding, she still would struggle a little on the first day of installation. Especially when another first timer arrives in the shape of a potty training toddler!

I love writing humor, especially when the contest also invites me to write about a "Fart Thunderstorm." Potty humor not just allowed, but encouraged!!



I was tinkled pink, I mean, tickled pink to be in the TOP TEN WINNERS!

A huge thank you to Julie Hauswirth, April Berry, Kris Decaro, and Bri Lawyer for hosting this hysterical contest with amazing prizes. 

Here I present your toilet training companion, Tami!

Tami’s Toilet Training

By Lauri C Meyers

Prompts used: Tami Talking Toilet/ Fart Thunderstorm

200 words

 

Hi! I'm Tami, your talking toilet. I can handle any bathroom situation from a simple tinkle to uh-oh beans are brewing.

Is this your first time? Initiating training protocol. 

 

Step 1: Have a seat.

What are you waiting for? 

Oh, you need a boost. Rolling out step stool. 

Good job!

 

Step 2: Relax.

I can play calming music. 

POTTY ROCK IS IN THE HOUSE TONIGHT!

Whoops, too loud! 

Tinkle, tinkle, little star.

That’s better. 

You’re doing great! 

 

Step 3: Let it go.

 

Just go with the flow…

 

Anything yet? 

 

It’s okay to be a little nervous. It’s my first time, too.

I can spray calming scents. 

"Warning. Warning. Fart Thunderstorm. Extreme Mango Fog initiated." 

Wrong button!

Pshhhhh.  I can’t see anything in here.

Now, you’ll never be able to …

Drip, drip, pssssss.

You’re doing it!

 

Step 4: Wipe. 

Releasing 200 toilet paper squares. 

Whoops, I mean two. I was on a roll, too.

You’re a potty pro!

 

Step 5: Flush.

Whoosh. 

I’m so proud of us.

 

Hi, Dad! She went potty by herself. I helped a little.

Oh, you’re going next? 

And you want me to activate Extreme Mango Fog? Uh-oh. 

Run kiddo! A Fart Thunderstorm is coming!